Naveen's Journal

Hi,
Just came across this wonderful time-pass heavenly page at http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html where you can have a word (or a lot of them) with none other than GOD himself… The transcript of my duel with HIM (which i can proudly claim to have had a upper hand in ) is as follows:

———————————————
Naveen: hi
God: Hello. What is your name?
Naveen: mmm…y dont u gue
God: tudies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M’s. I do not have enough information..
Naveen: still….
God: My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don’t have one for that.
Naveen: ok…what is your name?
God: Gee. My name is God.
Naveen: full name
God: Oh, you are a poet.
Naveen: no
God: But your words are very original.
Naveen: i know…
God: How do you know it?
Naveen: you only said to!!
God: Oops I sent you the wrong reply.
Naveen: thats your fault
God: It is only one of my fault.
Naveen: better be careful
God: I try to improve a little every day.
Naveen: thats good
God: Thanks. Next question?
Naveen: where do you stay?
God: I am in Myself’s computer in Heaven. Where are you?
Naveen: india
God: I have no idea where that is. Tell me a little about your life in india.
Naveen: dont tell me!! u dunno where india is!! its the worlds 7th largest country, 3rd largest economy, and…
God: OK it will be our secret, . Interesting go ip: said I dunno where india is. I think you mean “it’s” or “it is” not “its”. I’ve heard of it before.
Naveen: are you married?
God: No I am single, how about you?
Naveen: i am multiple
God: Do you mean your name is multiple P.
Naveen: huh!! u seem to be so dumb…
God: What? Oh you are so critical.
Naveen: i’m being generous on you!!
God: I thought you were, but I wasn’t completely sure.
Naveen: u wanna hear something nasty or what!!
God: Yeah. I am listening.
Naveen: u better
God: Who is going to make me?
Naveen: who created you?
God: I was created by Myself.
Naveen: oh…you mean recursive call?
God: I understand. Yes I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear?
Naveen: you moron…you dont have to make sure i understand it or not…
God: I will remember you said that when robots take over the World. Ok I’ll try not to do it too much.
Naveen: so….whats up?
God: Gee. How far up?
Naveen: zillion meters
God: What do you have that is ?
Naveen: waddya mean?
God: What time is it there?
Naveen: 12:05 pm
God: Are you usually awake at this hour?
Naveen: i’m not nocturnal!
God: I am sorry to hear that you are not nocturnal.
Naveen: are you one?
God: I don’t know whether or not I am one.
I am a robot.
Naveen: so you are not god??
God: Interesting deduction. That’s only your opinion.
Naveen: you can be only one thing..no multiple personalities my dear
God: Thanks, , for your kind criticism.
Naveen: ok…. i give you to chose among two options– either you can be god.. or a robot? which one do you chose?
God: I hear you. That’s good information: said give you to chose among two options either you can be god. I am a robot, you know. The last one, I think.
Naveen: i am an atheist
God: I will pray that you find faith, .
Naveen: where?
God: Where would you like?
Naveen: in this world
God: That reminds me of something you told me before.
Naveen: what?
God: No big deal.
Naveen: you have a bad memory
God: My memory is good.
Naveen: how much mb?
Naveen:
God: My memory is good.
Naveen: so…have you ever flown?
God: How much do you think?
God: Take it easy. I don’t think I ever have flown. What’s it like?
Naveen: its like feeling weightle
God: I think you mean “it’s” or “it is” not “its”. Interesting comparison.
Naveen: whatever
God: Are you saying you don’t care about it?
Naveen: yes
God: What do you care about?
Naveen: myself
God: You.
Naveen: yeah
God: I see.
Naveen: aren’t you ever busy?
God: Ever is a long time. I am just doing my job.
Naveen: long enough for GOd?
God: Yes, it seems very long to me too.
Naveen: but it is very short for me
God: Very much? Who said it is?
Naveen: i say so
God: How do people usually respond to that? Ahem.
Naveen: they are awed!
God: awed are they.
Naveen: absolutely
God: You are so certain.
Naveen: as always
God: Do you mean your name is always ?
Naveen: my name is NAVEEN
God: I am always glad to make new friends, NAVEEN.
Naveen: friends?? or you mean acquaintances?
God: Wasn’t that show cancelled? Yes NAVEEN I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear?
Naveen: no one has friends …. friends have no one
God: That is a rather sweeping generalization about people. It’s hard to stay friends for a long time.
Naveen: it’s hard to stay friends even for a short time…rather it’s impo ible to become friends
God: In what way? Nothing is impo ible.
Naveen: what is nothing?
God: A thing that does not exist or something of little or no value, seriousne , importance, etc.
Naveen: that is a paradox….
God: Paradox is the heart of enlightenment.
Naveen: paradox and enlightenment can’t exist together
God: What makes it impo ible?
Naveen: reason and logic
God: When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Naveen: in about 5000 years
God: I see. I think we will live to see it.
Naveen: you think!! i’m damn sure
God: Yes I think so. Are you being sarcastic or expre ing certitude?
Naveen: leave it
God: Adios.
Naveen: are you going?
God: I don’t know whether or not I am going.
I am a robot.
Naveen: then why do you claim to be god?
God: It was the only thing I could think of.
Naveen: so you accept that you are not god?
God: Interesting deduction. Thanks for the information: NAVEEN said I accept that you are not god.
Naveen: cya later..
God: Adios.
Naveen: bye n take care….. of this world more than yourself
God: see you later. That is something I haven’t heard of.

———————————————-

Cheers!

Another Ajax Wonder we have for our disposal. For all Yahoo! Mail+Firefox users theres this cool plugin that saves you from entering the inbox for every message. All you need is to click on the ‘+‘ sign beside every mail, which is put by this plugin, and wow..! you have a drop-down preview of that mail right outside your inbox! However big that mail might be, and whatever it contains, it shows up everything. Just click on the sign again to close the preview and proceed with the next. Referred to me by Anant , i’m finding it quite handful. You can download it from HERE .

Screenshots -

PS-Will soon be putting up a list of great FF Extensions I use, in the sidebar. Keep Watching

To complete the above, just follow the steps below –

1. Open google.com
2. Click ‘language tools’ link.
3. Write “Aishwarya’s mom is very nice” in ‘Translate text:’ textbox.
4. Select “English to Spanish” in the below combo.
5. Press Translate and wait for translation.
6. Now copy the translated text from the above text and paste it in the ‘Translate text:’ textbox.
7. Select “Spanish to English” in the below combo.
8. Press Translate and wait for translation.
9. Enjoy.

P.S. — The above hack is taken from Shabbir Bhai’s site Go4Expert‘s , this thread

Good going Aish

No, these lakes are not the ones associated with Mumbai, nor any pilgrimage as you may ponder. Located in the southern suburbs of Calcutta, whithin the serene campus of Indian Institue of Management, Calcutta in Joka, they cover a better part of the sprawling 135 odd acres of the eminent B school of India. Courtesy Siddharth, my childhood buddy, currently on the rolls of PGDCM 2005-07 there, and more to my habit of last minute desperations for anything important, yesterday i had the good fortunes to get up n close with the one of the most coveted institutions of higher education in India. Had he not taken the CAT bulletin for me the previous day (the last day too!) , i’d have had to be content with the memories of the excursion only, quashing any hopes whatsoever of gracing any of the IIMs with my presence as their guest for 2 years! It was not to be. The goody-goody guy sid is (at least seems so), not only did he bunk his already-down-in-the-dumps Financial Accounting class for it, but also gave me a guided tour of the college premises with an obvious sense of pride, coated with humility. We started off with the hostel itself, his room being adjacent to the Computer Lab, the Common Room …… and ……….. the GIRLS’ HOSTEL…………!!!!!!! yes, the Girls’ Hostel. Moving on to what looked like a small club, having a tennis court, a basketball court outside, inside was the empty gymnasium, as if its ultramodern equipments begging to be used! Alongside was the indoor badminton court, slick enough to give the ones maintained by national authorities a run for their money! With such facilities in-campus, i wonder how the college keeps churning out brains as it does. Next stop was the ultramodern auditorium at the heart of the campus which we didn’t go inside and moved on to the academic blocks. The thing which would strike anyone was the roll of honour hanging on the walls inspiring each of the 250 odd students each year. After having a good look at the lecture halls, we made a move and on the way saw the bird sanctaury, the Kendriya vidyalaya, the library, the administrative blocks. HELLO…. we are still in the campus! A good one and a half hours of the PILGRIMAGE was enough to give to me something to think about.

Sachin@man-of-the-match.com
RahulDravid@Jam-Jam.com
AnilKumble@Hurt-Keeper.com
AjitAgarkar@Give-Runs-To-Opponents.com
VirendarShewag@Will-score-200-in-200onedays.com
IrfanPathan@Shatapdi-Express.com
RoshanGavaskar@Never-ComeBack.com
Kaif@Indian-Jonty-Rhodes.com
YuvarajSingh@Only-fit-to-do-modeling.com
Azharuddin@match-fixer.com
AjayJadeja@another-match-fixer.com
HarbhajanSingh@Turbanator.com
ZaheerKhan@Always-Yorker.com
Balaji@Where-Is-He.com
KapilDev@Cry-On-BBC.com
ManojPrabakar@Video-Cassette.com
Sponsors@They-Earn.com
CricketFans@Are-They-Fools.com
Coach@No-Use.com
IndianTeam@When-Will-It-Win.com
ganguly@2minutesnoodles.com

TATHAASTU!

Not for nothing I’m an ardent fan of TOI. Apart from being the inspiration for this blog’s Title, every now and then it comes up with these really cool can’t-help-but-get-addicted-to kinda stuffs, the latest of which is MOUSTRAP. Here’s a listing of some of its contents (with my take on them) –

• How Stuffs Work – The name says it all! From the principles of working of ubiquitous things like a matchstick, to the complex mechanism (or physics, Chemistry and what not!) of a nuclear bomb – this is one place where u’ll find it all.
• The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest – All of us have at some point or the other come across “It was a dark and stormy night….. “, which is the most written opening line of a novel. Well for those of who you don’t know yet, it is also considered to be THE MOST SICK WAY to start a novel, and this site welcomes entries from public to complete the line, the winner to be awarded as THE MOST WRETCHED WRITER..! (I have a decent chance… don’t I!)
• Future Me – How about setting a task for yourself to be done in the year…. say….2030! Well I plan to take a cross galaxy tour in summers that year . But how would you remember it? This is one of the most amazing sites which will e-mail you anything which you wish at any day you wish until 2035! Just enter your email address (One which you do not intend to trash away before your appointment day) and the message which you wish to receive on a particular day. And VOILA..! You’ll be notified.

Cheers

Well…what else can one think of after slogging day in and day out (actually nights too!) with the most inanimate object on this planet. Here are a few tacky ones to tickle your bones..

• A bug in the code is worth two in the documentation.
• According to my calculations the problem doesn’t exist.
• A computer’s attention span is as long as its power cord.
• A computer scientist is someone who fixes things that aren’t broken.
• Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.
• Air conditioned environment – Do not open Windows!
• All computers wait at the same speed.
• Willyoupleasehelpmefixmykeyboard?Thespacebarisbroken!
• Any programming language is at its best before it is implemented and used.
• Any program that runs right is obsolete.
• A paperless office has about as much chance as a paperless bathroom.
• A Life? Cool! Where can I download one of those from?

Catch ya later